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How to Identify an Indian - observations of a white Canadian son-in- law
>> of an Indian family.
>>
>>
>>
>> 1. Everything you eat is flavored with garlic, onion and tomatoes .
>>
>>
>>
>> 2.. You try and reuse gift wrappers, gift boxes, and of course aluminum
>> foil.
>>
>>
>>
>> 3. You are Always standing next to the two largest size suitcases at the
>> Airport.
>>
>>
>> 4. You arrive one or two hours late to a party - and think it’s normal.
>>
>>
>> 5. You peel the stamps off letters that the Postal Service missed to
>> stamp.
>>
>>
>> 6. You recycle Wedding Gifts, Birthday Gifts and Anniversary Gifts.
>>
>>
>> 7. You name your children in rhythms (example, Sita & Gita, Ram & Shyam,
>> Kamini & Shamini.)
>>
>>
>> 8. All your children have pet names, which sound nowhere close to their
>> real names.
>>
>>
>> 9. You take Indian snacks anywhere it says ‘No Food Allowed’ .
>>
>>
>> 10. You talk for an hour at the front door when leaving someone’s house.
>>
>>
>> 11. You load up the family car with as many people as possible..
>>
>>
>>
>> 12.. You use plastic to cover anything new in your house whether it’s
>> the remote control, VCR, carpet or new couch.
>>
>>
>> 13. Your parents tell you not to care what your friends think, but they
>> won’t let you do certain things because of what the other ‘Uncles and
>> Aunties’ will think.
>>
>>
>> 14. You buy and display crockery, which is never used, as it is for
>> special occasions, which never happen.
>>
>>
>> 15. You have a vinyl tablecloth on your kitchen table.
>>
>>
>> 16. You use grocery bags to hold garbage.
>>
>>
>> 17. You keep leftover food in your fridge in as many numbers of bowls as
>> possible.
>>
>>
>> 18. Your kitchen shelf is full of jars, varieties of bowls and plastic
>> utensils (got free with purchase of other stuff )
>>
>>
>> 19. You carry a stash of your own food whenever you travel (and travel
>> means any car ride longer than 15 minutes).
>>
>>
>> 20. You own a rice cooker or a pressure cooker.
>>
>>
>> 21. You fight over who pays the dinner bill.
>>
>>
>> 22. You live with your parents and you are 40 years old. (And they
>> prefer it that way).
>>
>>
>> 23. You don’t use measuring cups when cooking.
>>
>>
>> 24. You never learnt how to stand in a queue.
>>
>>
>>
>> 25. You can only travel if there are 5 persons at least to see you off
>> or receive you whether you are traveling by bus, train or plane.
>>
>>
>> 26. If she is NOT your daughter, you always take interest in knowing
>> whose daughter has run with whose son and feel proud to spread it at the
>> velocity of more than the speed of light.
>>
>>
>> 27. Your wedding gifts are mostly in cash with a one rupee coin added to
>> the note in a cover.
>>
>>
>> 28. If you don’t live at home, when your parents call, they ask if
>> you’ve eaten, even if it’s midnight.
>>
>>
>> 29. You call an older person you never met before Uncle or Aunty.
>>
>>
>> 30. When your parents meet strangers and talk for a few minutes, you
>> discover you’re talking to a distant cousin.
>>
>>
>> 31. Your parents don’t realize phone connections to foreign countries
>> have improved in the last two decades, and still scream at the top of
>> their lungs when making foreign calls.
>>
>>
>> 32. You have bed sheets on your sofas so as to keep them from getting
>> dirty.
>>
>>
>> 33. It’s embarrassing if your wedding has less than 600 people.
>>
>>
>> 34. All your Tupperware is stained with food color.
>>
>>
>> 35. You have drinking glasses made of steel.
>>
>>
>> 36. You have mastered the art of bargaining in shopping.
>>
>>
>> 37. You have really enjoyed reading this mail - forward it to as many
>> Indians as possible.
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